Monday, January 19, 2009

Missing!

I have the blues tonight, again! I can't seem to shake them! Seems that they come and go quite frequently.
I miss my best friend!
I miss him sitting at the kitchen table when I walk in the door from work.
I miss the pot of coffee he would have waiting for me when I got home from work.
I miss his snoring, I really do!
I miss his scratchy moustache kisses.
I miss his gentleness.
I miss his freezing feet in my bed.
I miss the morning kiss and goodbye, have a good day.
I miss his quiet laughter and his smile.
I miss him teasing me.
I miss not having anyone to be with.
I miss his hugs.
I miss not having him here to care for.
I miss conversations.
I miss being a wife!

Although he lives in my heart, I miss the Love of my Life!!

25 comments:

Cathy said...

Hello Marla
Sorry to hear you're feeling down.
Lets hope tomorrow will be a better one
Take care
Cathy

Lanny said...

Oh Marla. Your emotions were well expressed.

LL Cool Joe said...

I hope you don't mind me commenting but I saw your name on Scarlet's blog.

It's truly the worst feeling in the world missing someone. :(

Corny as it sounds, it does get easier, eventually, but you have to go through this terrible time before it does.

Hope you feel better soon.

Scarlet said...

You make me miss him, too, and I didn't even know him. :)

You write so passionately about him. Maybe one day you'll share more stories, the ones that make you smile.

Lucy Stern said...

Yes, that has to be hard.....I can't imagine living without my husband. I am sure time will help this but it is down right miserable getting to that point. Try to smile and know that he is waiting for you on the other side...You will see him again...

As for your question: I do use a lot of those hints on how to save on groceries. I do use coupons and save a bundle on groceries. Things like rice, flour, oats and etc., I buy in bulk and pack away for future use. I never pay full price for meat because I buy it from the discount bin and freeze it. Last week I got 90/10 ground beef for $ 1.09 per pound. With grandkids over all the time, I buy yogurt marked down and they eat it up in no time. I also have a set amount of money (cash) that I use for groceries every week...If I use it up before the next week, then I don't buy anything else.

Know that I am thinking about you and hope your mood lifts soon.

Cliff said...

I wish there was something to do to help but then I guess those are memories you must keep fresh. You don't want to forget. Precious memories indeed. I'm sorry he is not with you still.

Sue said...

Sorry you are feeling down. I still have my spouse, but I do miss my Mom. I missed her for several years before she passed away from Alhiezmers.

Mary said...

Marla,

What you are going through is part of the grieving process. It will get better, I swear. I went through this at a very young age and when my first husband died. It is difficult to say the least. I'm praying for you.

Blessings,
Mary

Jim said...

Hi Marla. I know you do miss him. Dad used to say he didn't know why He wouldn't take him as He had taken Mom. He missed her so much!
Mrs. Jim has a lot of ladies who are just waiting in line for me if she would die. They say that but those ladies only see the nice side of me. I'm pretty onery and stubborn.
Thank you for your nice visits. I am trying to catch up now, I might not make it, ever. I'm also getting my office back in order if that is possible.
..

EV said...

Peace be with you, Marla.

FlowerLady said...

Your post really touched my heart.

What you are going through is perfectly natural. How could you not be feeling blue with the loss of your DH.

You miss your love, your soulmate, your best friend.

Just remember, LOVE IS FOREVER.

FlowerLady

Arlene said...

Oh Marla. I wish there was something i could do to help. But you know the only one who can is the Lord. Keep reading and praying he'll get you through this. Treasure those memories and someday they will bring you comfort instead of sorrow.

Love you
Arlene

Jamie Dawn said...

I think your blog is working as a kind of therapy for you. Here, you are able to express your feelings and pour out your heart in writing. I think we all need to have a way to get our feelings out and really look at them and digest them. It's a way of dealing with them. I admire your strength as you've moved forward with your life while your heart is aching and much of it longs for what you had in the past. I don't think that ache will ever go away. When you lose someone that you love so much, that piece of your heart is not restored until heaven. I do think that by acknowledging your emotional lows and talking about them and talking about how much you miss your dear husband, you are slowly allowing some healing to take place in your very wounded spirit. I hope we (your blog buddies) can be of some comfort to you. I'm so sorry for all the pain you are feeling.

My ADHD Me said...

I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I hope writing about it helps.
I said a prayer for you.

Granny Annie said...

Bless your heart Marla. I'm so sorry I have not been supportive. My blogger is messed up and it tells me you haven't posted when you have. I'll try to be better. You are going through such a difficult time yet you remain a champion. Pete would be so proud. (Does that sound trite? I hope not.)

dana wyzard said...

Just so you'll know. It's 2am and I can't sleep, as usual. I just found this blog and I am using this moment to say "hello hon", and then I am going to go back and read your blog forward. All of it.

Loving Annie said...

Marla,
Loss is so hard... It really aches and lingers and so much of your life has been completely changed...

I don't know you or your story with Pete since it is the first time I came to your blog, but my empathy to you...

Blogging kept me from a complete nervous breakdown and maybe even dying when the love of my life abandoned me three years ago...

Hope we can give you some comfort, even if we aren't your Pete.

Genuinely,
Loving Annie

Jim said...

Hi Marla, another tid-bit, I would tell my Dad that God was still using him and He wasn't ready for him to be in Heaven yet with Mom.
He never said anything, so I kept on, telling him all the good he was doing for others here on earth. It was true.

Adi gets washed in the little plastic dish pan. I put her back two feet in and poor water over her. Then I put her front two feet in and get her wet in front. Getting wet was all I ever used the tub for anyway.

I'll bet you could wash your dog, just let it be known that you are the boss and you don't want foolishness.
..
I believe Loving Annie is right, blogging is therapy of sorts. I did go bonkers and even got an ulcer and had to go into the hospital when my ex left me.
No blogs those days. Now Mrs. Jim is liable to leave me because I blog so much. :-)
..
And our weather man is just now saying it is cold up there again!
..

Tabor said...

Marla thank you for stopping by my blog. This community of bloggers will give you some respite...some strength...to make it through this very sad time. You will heal, but I hope these next weeks are better. We all hold your 'virtual' hand and offer a 'virtual' shoulder.

Paul Nichols said...

Well said. Well written.

Lucy Stern said...

I've been thinking about you so much lately....we miss you...

Ramblings of a Villas Girl said...

Marla I wish knew what to say. Well how about this. Those memories you are having now hurt, but eventually those same memories will bring a smile. We never really get over the 'missing' part, but the memories make it a bit easier. Lisa

Edie said...

Big ((hugs)) to you Marla.

I started reading 90 Minutes in Heaven this week. I'm halfway finished with the book. It's actually more about what happend after he came back. Anyway, I thought of you as I read his description of heaven. Well, your situation. We have so many sorrows on this side, but there is something so Spectacular on the other side. And it is ours for more than a little while. I'm sorry, this may not be helping at all, but you will see him again, and it will be forever.

Love you.

Oh Lord, reach out your loving arms to your daughter and comfort her with your love. Wrap your arms around her and make your very Presence known intimately to her.
In Christ - Amen

Mary said...

Checking in to see how you are doing. I'm keeping you in my prayers.

Blessings,
Mary

Chatty Kelly said...

I can't imagine what you are going through - but God can! So rest in his loving arms, he knows. One day at a time.